Deadlines!

The other day I was trying to fit 4 hours worth of work into a two hour window of time - have you ever done that... yeah right, who hasn't!

In today's world it seems as if we're always rushing to catch up with something or someone, not to miss out or be left behind. When we're at work thoughts of family and friends, obligations and/or distractions, clutter our minds and take up our time. And when we're at home we're worried about work, or letting 'home' work steal away the time we should be spending with family and friends, taking care of our responsibilities or enjoying ourselves. I think this is part of the reason we're always rushing (not all of the reason, just part!). We don't fully 'engage' ourselves in the moment.

When the time comes for us to be doing something maybe we're there physically but we're often not there mentally or emotionally. Our heads are thinking about what happened yesterday, or planning what's yet to be. Our emotions are at best benign - not too 'committed' to the activity of the present because we're enjoying our memories of the past, or perhaps anxious about the future, or worse, maybe complaining about the present. How can we give 100% effort when we're not giving 100% attendance? And it stands to reason that if you're only 70% 'there' you'll only get about 70% done - you see where I'm going with this don't you? - This is why we're always feeling like we're running to just catch up - we weren't really there 100%!

I've always said, 'Life's short - work to live, don't live for work!', and generally in work circumstances, I've been the boss so I don't say that because I thing employees should take it easy; more the other way around. But I believe that when we're balanced in our lives - a little work, a little fun, and a little rest - everything works better...everything!

I'd put off getting some work done, it was hard 'cause I'd never done it before, and I didn't feel particularly comfortable with my abilities in doing it - so I was dreading the process. Hence I procrastinated. When I should have been writing the summary of chapters or the query letter for the publishers for my book proposal, I was busy with answering emails or returning phone message. Heck, I even did some research rather than move on what I was supposed to do! In the very last hour before it was due, I finished writing what I should of done the week before and rushed it off to FedEx to get it overnight. I got there with 10 minutes to spare - aah, made it! Or so I thought - I was told by the clerk at Kinko's (when she finally got to me) - 'Oh sorry, we just closed our deliveries for overnight - the computers does it automatically at 5:15. Of course I was thinking, 'what the heck! didn't the computer (you) see me here waiting and realize I needed to send this ASAP tonight - it can't wait!' But instead I just asked if there was anyway it could still go out tonight - luckily she said 'yes, if you take it to the headquarters by the airport and have it there by 5:45'. No problem I thought - it's only 5:15, I was looking forward to the thirty minute drive in 5 o'clock traffic - it'll take me an hour!

So off I rushed...weaving through traffic, praying I wouldn't cause an accident or get a ticket - Yes I talk to God about those thing too, though it's a little ironic to ask Him to help hide me when I'm breaking the law. It always seems I get stuck behind someone who is going way too slow when I'm trying to go way too fast - then I remember I prayed for God not too let me 'cause an accident or get a ticket, and I realize that this slow driver in front of me (which I can't seem to get around) is probably my answer to prayer. I know what I should be doing, but sometimes I just do what I want to do, or think I need to do. God knows this about me, and sometimes in His mercy, He answers my prayer for help in ways I may not appreciate, but need. Has that ever happened to you?

I made it to the headquarters of FedEx at 5:40 - Yeah!!!

But wait, it wasn't quite that easy - the clerk there informs me that the other clerk was wrong -they can't guarantee deliver next day after 5:15 at any office! However, the truck was still there and it would probably still make it by noon the next day (aah, finally some good news!) But no I was wrong - when the clerk looked at the package she proceeded to tell me, 'oh sorry, we can't take this package as addressed - we don't deliver to post office boxes. I didn't know FedEx doesn't deliver to P.O. boxes - couldn't the first clerk had told me this before I risked life and limb to make it to the headquarters office before 5:45!

However she did give me shred of hope I'd still make my deadline - 'If you take it to the Post Office Annex I think they can overnight it - and they don't close 'til 7 PM.' she said!

Yes! There is hope - I'm off again - the Annex is just another 20 minutes further, I should make it there by 6:15 long before they close... Oh wait, did I forget to tell you I was hosting a dinner at 6:00 - which of course I hadn't cooked for because I was busy doing my chapter summary - which I should of done on Saturday but I was too busy doing some shopping for the house, and visiting with friends, and watching TV and... yeah, I guess I wasn't engaged in what I should have been doing when I should have been doing it...well back to the ordeal of the day - Calling the house, my one daughter picked up some items from the grocery store, my other daughter set the table, the other one cooked, and the other one helped pick up the house (I've got 5 girls but one of them was out at the time). They were busy rushing around helping me put together a dinner while I was driving to Timbuktu! I asked my husband to entertain and delay dinner - which he did graciously.

I got to the Annex at 6:15, feeling bad about our guests but good about finally getting the package sent and meeting my deadline - or so I thought. But - you got it - it was not to be. The Annex doesn't do 'Express Overnight Mail' after 5 - so sorry, they said.

Sorry! Sorry! Honey you don't know sorry! I was thinking - - - instead I dragged myself to the car and sat there feeling defeated. After all my efforts, I still didn't get the package mailed and failed to meet my deadline - I tried so hard - it just wasn't fair!

Then that small voice inside of me started to speak to me - I know it wasn't my conscience but the Holy Spirit - I know it was the Holy Spirit because He always speaks wisdom, and peace - all I was spurting at the moment was anger, misery, and self-pity - and He said, 'Caroline, think about it - you're trying to find blame in traffic, people in line, misinformed clerks, slow drivers - everyone but where the blame really lies...you didn't do what you needed to do when you needed to be doing it. Your procrastination led to others being inconvenienced (the kids, the clerks, the other drivers on the road) and to your not meeting the deadline. You didn't put first things first and you let yourself be distracted with things you wanted to do, instead of things you needed to do. YOU are the one that didn't meet the deadline, it was YOUR choices that caused it, nothing else.

This is the part we Christians call 'being convicted'. I was being convicted of my sins - I failed to be diligent to my work (God says do all things as if unto the Lord - I hadn't, I'd done things as I pleased, not as it pleases Him). I had been discourteous, quick tempered, and prideful - thinking that things should have worked the way I wanted them to, because I wanted them to; as if I deserved things to work out for me. But the neat thing about being a Christian is that when you're convicted of a sin, and respond appropriately, you're not condemned by it. There is hope!

I asked God to forgive me, and I asked for Him to have things work out as He would like them to - for my good - and I thanked Him for keeping me safe, for teaching me this lesson about putting first things first (again), and for taking this situation and promising to bring good out of it (He does promise this in the Bible - if we give God our life circumstances and trust and follow Him where He leads - He will bring good out of even the worst things in life). Then I calmly drove home, had a great dinner with my guest and family. It was a good night.

The next morning I got up and was pleased to find out that the final deadline was extended to the following day. I also found out that the PO box address I had was incorrect, and I was able to FedEx and meet the final deadline! Life is hard but God is good. I left it in His hands and He worked everything out for my good - pretty amazing huh!?!? =)

But there is a catch -

If you don't learn your lessons and you continue to repeat the same negative behavior - then you'll continue to have difficult 'stress' filled situations - and often the lessons get even tougher the more you have to go through them!

So, learn from my life lessons:

Don't procrastinate and blame others for your shortfalls, and do what you need to do when you need to do it - remember to give a 100% every time!

Proverbs 13:4 NIV

"The sluggard craves and gets nothing, but the desires of the diligent are fully satisfied."